Panelists

Matt

While Matt was recording an episode of Drive to Ant’s he had the realization that for the last six weeks of episodes he and Ant had brought up one TV show after another. It was at that moment that Matt realized that he should put even more work onto himself and create another podcast…you know the one whose site you are on right now.

When he is not busy creating or cohosting podcasts, Matt likes to split his time between sitting in his chair sipping scotch watching every manner of television show ever created (except for Grey’s Anatomy) and yelling at the kids outside his house to get off his lawn. Puzzlingly enough, Matt actually lives in an apartment above a bakery and does not in fact, have a lawn.

Anthony

Seven years ago, Ant wrote what he considers to be the greatest romantic comedy ever written. Anyone who has read it finds it hard to disagree. While he has shopped it to numerous studios, they have all politely declined, conceding that it is indeed one of the most remarkable things ever written, they just could not figure out a way to get the multiple hardcore sex scenes past the MPAA. Ant has worked with multiple screenwriters including Aaron Sorkin and Ethan Coen in an attempt to rework the story to be as poignant and beautiful without the graphic scenes of pornography. None have succeeded.

Anthony, the other cohost of this show in addition to his namesake show, Drive to Ant’s, is a complicated fellow who spends most of his free time also watching television (except that he likes Grey’s Anatomy for a reason that scientists have yet to figure out). His encyclopedic knowledge of all things TV make him the ideal cohost and panelist on this show.

Dave

Anything interesting that could be said about Dave has been deemed “Too important to national security” and is therefore classified until further notice.

Crystal

Crystal is the daughter of a Kenyan tribal princess and of an American photojournalist who were victims of a plane crash that destroyed her home and left her an orphan. With nothing to do and nowhere to go, Crystal wondered the streets of Cairo for weeks. Surviving on a single slice of bread that she pulled from the wreckage of her home. She was offered food multiple times during her weeks on the streets. Many kind people offered to take her in or at least provide her with clothes or shelter. Each time Crystal replied with “Nah, I’m good.” and went along her way. She eventually met master thief, Achmed El Gibár and under his tutelage became the most prolific pickpocket in all of Egypt.

While she did not have a television to call her own growing up, she eventually had purloined enough parts to build one herself. Stealing the pieces one by one from unsuspecting tourists. From that moment on, Crystal devoted herself to the sacred knowledge of every cartoon and anime imaginable, eventually learning enough to catch the eye of Matt and earn her a spot as a panelist on Bingeworthy.

Steve

Steve has survived for many years on his guile alone. A master tradesmen from an early age, Steve was sent to school on the first day of second grade with his bookbag and lunch money, before the end of recess, he had traded his way up into becoming the majority shareholder of General Electric. When the bell rang at the conclusion of recess and his teacher beckoned for Steve to return inside, Steve simply shook his head stating, “There is nothing left for you to teach me.” and walked away.

In the preceding years, Steve tore his way through the Fortune 500, staging hostile takeovers regardless of if they were necessary or not. With no world’s in business left to conquer, he turned inward and to television, becoming the first person in history to watch the entire catalogue of Netflix in a single sitting before finding his way to this podcast.

Ali

Before becoming the TV show reviewing phenom that has taken Bingeworthy by storm, Ali played a key role in the most monumental court case of all time, known simply as People v People. What started as a simple disagreement between these people over here versus these people over there regarding the outcome of a particularly vicious tether-ball match became a decades long, multi-precedent-setting, epic where no less than seventeen judges had to recuse themselves and every single witness had to be treated as hostile.

Ali, the hot-shot attorney was given the impossible task of defending People from their juggernaut of an opposition. Fighting bravely though 251,382 depositions and more than a dozen games of “Horse”, Ali saw victory in her grasp when she outwitted her opponent by finding three contradictions in a statement and landing a particularly impressive fade-away shot from behind the key. Then, disaster struck when it was determined that Ali too, had to recuse herself after it was discovered that she had not only served on the grand jury for the case, but had briefly been judge as well. Knowing that she would never be able to top the meth-like high of participating in the still-ongoing court case, Ali retired from law and decided to become a panelist on this podcast.